Trouble Right Here in Amytown

The other day I was sitting with Molly – I forget what we were doing – but I turned my attention to her and asked:

MOM: So, Molly, what’s up in Molly world?

MOLLY: Huh? I mean, ma’am?

MOM: What’s shakin’ in Mollytown? What’s happenin’? Aren’t you the ruler of Mollyville??

MOLLY: No, Mom, I’m not the ruler…Jesus is.

Later that evening, we were all sitting at the dinner table and I relayed the interchange to the rest of our family. Michael joined in…

MICHAEL: So, Jesus is the ruler of Mollyville, huh?

MOLLY: Yes, Daddy, but I AM the president.

I share this because it got me thinking of how much of a dictatorship Amytown is sometimes. Amytown is often very important to me, and I just dare one to make it difficult or messy. Amytown is at its best when it is neat and tidy. I like to talk about Amytown (obviously), making sure Amytown has everything it needs. Amytown is often a slave to order and predictability…but some of the best “towns” are, am I right? Amytown is a comfortable place (or at least, her ruler-ME-desires it to be…sometimes above all else).

It’s laughable, really, how often I do make life about me, what I want, what bothers me, and how to bring comfort back to those raw, uncomfortable places.

The last few days have been very encouraging ones to me. God has sent some people my way to remind me which way to face. When I am too mired down in thinking about how life is affecting me and looking only at my circumstances, I forget who is holding me, and more than that – who is holding the universe. God is in this, and he wants me to take my eyes off of self and put them back where they belong…on Him.

So, thank you Molly, for reminding me that ultimately I want Jesus to be ruler of Amytown, not me. In fact, I don’t even want to be president when you get right down to it. Maybe some unimportant cabinet position or something…ok, now this is just getting weird.

Bless ya!

Back to Reality

I think it's funny that every so often some poor person ends up on my blog who is just looking for a way to get crayons off their clothes once they've been through the dryer. This is all thanks to Google. If you do a search for "get crayons off clothes in dryer" or something like that, my blog will be among the results.

Boy, have I been there. Those crayons are little dickens to get off, as well. Actually, you can't really remove it all. I think Michael has a couple shirts which are monuments to the elusive crayon in the dryer.

I got to have a break this week. It was so relaxing and so energizing. The tanks feel full.

Julie, Terry: I love you! I had such a wonderful time with you both! I'm so thankful God caused our lives to intersect. Yours are friendships I will cherish all my life...thanks!

And Alex, Jean and Michelle: I love you as well! Thank you for taking care of my children for me so I could rest. I never worried about them for one second. You are a like a gift to me!! I appreciate you so much...thanks!

Sigh...life is good.

Bless ya!

Right or Left?

Last week we were all in the car and I heard Mason yell from the back seat:

"Mom! Which one's my right hand and which one's my left?"

Michael and I glanced at each other. How could he forget this? I mean, didn't he learn this years ago? he's almost 10 for Pete's sake!

I yelled back that your left is the one that can make a correct looking "L for left" with your thumb and pointer finger. (Isn't that how you remember it?)

It made me think...

Sometimes I walk around like I am an orphan. Like I have no heavenly Father. Like I have no Holy Spirit to speak to me. Sometimes the cares of this world come crashing down and I forget what's true: I forget the gospel.

Thankfully, when I do forget, God is sweet to remind me. He doesn't srcunch up his face and wonder, "How can she forget this? Didn't she learn this years ago? She's 40 for Pete's sake!" No. Instead he is kind to show Himself again and remind me that he sees all I see, and more. Things may look hopeless, they may look real, real bad, but God is good and he is all I need.

Bless ya!

By the way...who is this "Pete" anyway, and why do we say things for his sake?

Rocks for Money

A few weeks ago Molly and Caroline were looking for some ways to earn some extra spending money. Caroline is saving her pennies to buy Felicity's bed ensemble...it costs about $100. That, to me, seems like a daunting amount for an 8 year old to save with no birthday or Christmas in near sight. When I was her age I would have given up at about $25, had my mom drive me to Harco (remember Harco?) so I could buy $25 worth of bubble gum and lip gloss. But that's neither here nor there.

My kids are savers. Well, Mason and Caroline are; Molly has to get rid of her money the instant she has a dime. Pull the car over, Mom! I've got to find a gumball machine! Mason actually saved every dime to buy his Nintendo DS. He then saved to get some Wii games and controllers. He denies himself in order to get the thing he really wants. Caroline is the same way, though at time it is painful for her. I bought the kids winter Crocs for Valentine's Day (they were $10 on sale). They wanted some of those little "thingamabobs" that you can poke into the holes on the crocs, so we went back to the store to look at their selection. Everybody picked out 2 or 3, and produced the cash to pay for such. I looked over at Caroline. She was starting to tear up looking at the cute little "Cinderella" thingy (I really don't know the name for these. Anybody?)

"What's wrong, sweetheart?" I asked

"I really want one of those thingys...but I also really want to save for Felicity's bed set!"

"Well, Caroline, I think you should save for the thing you really want."

"Yes, but everyone else is getting one!"

"And then their money will be gone, but you'll still have a good head start on your bed for Felicity. Would you like to buy just one thingy instead of two?"

"No, Mom...I'm going to save my money for the bed."

Anyway, back to my story...the one about the girls looking for ways to earn some extra money.

Michael told the girls that he would give them 1 penny for each rock they picked up out of the yard. At first I thought that was kind of cruel. I mean, they would be out there working for what, to them, would seem like all day, and for their effort they might get 50 cents. Maybe a dollar if they were fast.

Michael and I grossly underestimated our dainty little girls.

Caroline wanted to know how many rocks she'd have to pick up to earn $20. 2000 rocks, I told her.

Later, on the porch, sat 2 huge buckets full of rocks. 2000 rocks. Caroline earned $20 that day, and Molly earned $18, I think.

Tenacity like that makes me want to just call the American Girl company and pay for that bed myself. She deserves it! But in the long run, I know that she will prize the bed much, much more if she saves the money for it herself. It's good for her to learn lessons of sacrifice and delayed gratification. I still need reminders of these quite often. I know it's just a doll bed; I know it's just a "thing", but I love what it's doing in her heart. I pray that as she grows up, not having been given everything her little heart desires, that she grows to be content with the things that are really important, that she loves the Lord with all her heart, soul, mind, and strength, and that the "doll beds" of her life are just the icing.

Bless ya!

The Twilight Years

I turned 40 last month.

It was a wonderful day! Michael and the kids made me breakfast (apple/pear turnovers from scratch and raspberry milkshakes). I had lunch with some of my sweet friends, shopped at the thrift store and then later, at the Beehive, Michael and the kids threw me a surprise party. It was all the more sweet because my sweet husband and children were really "into" it. They made most of the food and came up with the plan. The gave me a new Blackberry, and I got lots of great presents. I felt so special, and I will remember that day until my mind goes...probably in a couple years.

Something happened though, a few days later, which put a bit of a damper on the bliss in my heart:

I received an application from the AARP.

Did some jokester out there fill out an interest card in my name? Is 40 the age the AARP starts taking new members? I would think at least 50 would be more appropriate!! Is it really time for me to be thinking of Medicare? Nursing home insurance? I thought 40 was the new 30?!

I became slightly forlorn and decided to look up AARP on the web. Guess what? It IS 50!! So, I have one more decade before I have to start thinking about that. Whew!

I'm guessing it was my brother. He's always doing stuff like that!

Bless ya!

My Funny Valentine

Ahh, Valentine’s Day. The holiday of love…an ode to romance. A day of hearts and chocolate.

Our Valentine’s day started out much like yours did, I’m sure. When all in the children were awake we exchanged our Valentine sentiments in the form of candy, cards, and many hugs. Following this, we all did our morning chores, got dressed and hopped in the van for a trip to Mobile and lunch at Chik-fil-A. Who could ask for more?

Michael and I had reservations for dinner at the Beehive (our local coffee shop/bookstore) at 7pm. Had a babysitter, the whole 9 yards. We had plenty of time to enjoy ourselves in Mobile…and it’s always good to get out of town for a bit.

We got to Chik-Fil-A around 12:15, after taking a short detour to Game Stop. Molly had $20 burning a hole in her pocket and decided a new Wii game was just the ticket (it’s some kind of Barbie game…she rides a horse and has to take care of it and stuff. I played it – it’s quite fun).

We enjoyed our lunch and the kids played on the playground while Michael and I read our books. It was nice.

Before leaving Mobile we stopped by Lowe’s. Michael got some seeds for the garden, and in the parking lot on our way out, Mason picked something up off the ground. It had 2 yellow feathers on it. It was a roach clip. And on the end of it was a piece of a joint.

Now, let me go ahead and say on cyberspace, that I have never tried marijuana…but I DO know what a roach clip is, because some kooky time back in the 80’s it became cool to own a roach clip and clip it to stuff. Some girls wore them in their hair. I saw guys with them clipped to their cowboy hats. Don’t ask me why – people just did it. I personally had one that I bought at a flea market clipped to the curtain in my bedroom. I didn’t know what they were used for , but if everyone else was going to have one – I was, too. It was kind of like the Rubic’s cube keychain (which I bought at the same flea market)…it was one of those things you just had if you were a child of the 80’s…and lived in Sylacauga.

When Mason showed me his “treasure”, I just didn’t know what to say or do. Literally, I was speechless for a moment. Finally I said, “Throw that thing down!” then got into the car, and to change the subject passed around a box of tic-tacs and told everyone they could have one joint a piece.

Yes, I actually said that.

On the way home Mason and Ethan were uncharacteristically quiet. Ethan finally fell asleep, but Mason began to moan.

It’s 10 hours later now (11:45 pm). Michael and I missed our date at the Beehive. Ethan has a fever of 101.9. Mason is laying on the couch with stomach malaise and needs me. I’ll be home from church in the morning, and I had to cancel our visit from Caroline G tomorrow.

After his dinner of cold pizza and some corkscrew pasta with a little parmesan on top (and before he headed off to bed) Michael gave me a Valentine card. I jumped up and gave him the card I had bought for him, too. A quick hug, kiss and “I love you…goodnight” was the apex of our romantic holiday.

But it’s ok. It’s kind of silly, really. I mean, we should be cherishing the people we love every day…not just once a year, right?

One side note: I feel I need to come clean on something. It's true that one year Michael gave me a dustbuster for Valentine’s Day. He likes to use that as a self-deprecating illustration, but you know what? I ASKED for the dustbuster. It was early on in our marriage, we were broke, and the thing was like fifty bucks! I told him that with a baby coming we’d need a dustbuster and he could give it to me as my Valentine’s present. So when you think about it, giving me a dustbuster for Valentine’s Day was actually a self-sacrificing thing, with all the ribbing he’s gotten for it over the years.

That’s my Valentine! Hope you had a good one…

Bless ya!

Wii!!!!!

Last Friday morning Molly went out to get the paper (it’s one of her daily chores). On her way back in, something caught her eye. Evidently during the night an unknown benefactor and dear person left something on our porch.

It was a bit heavy for Molly to carry inside (?), so she called her brother Mason to her aid. They brought the bag to me. I told them it must be a belated Christmas present, but the tag said only “MacCaughelty Family”; the giver’s name was absent.

As I was trying to get the tape off, Mason said, “What if it’s a Wii?”

“It’s not a Wii,” I said in reply.

I loosed the tape and removed the paper. We all looked down into the bag together and saw it there…sideways…Wii.

For a moment, everyone was quiet, but pandemonium soon broke out.

“Who’s it from?” Caroline asked.

This is the thing…I have no idea who it is from. Well, I have an idea who it might be from, but they didn’t give me their name, so they must not want me to know. And how cool is that? Too often we want recognition for some good deed we do, but this person wanted us to wonder and to simply enjoy the gift without strings. And wonder/enjoy we have. Ultimately, though, we believe this great gift is from the Lord, who put it on the heart of the giver to bless us in wonderful ways. I don’t know who it’s from, and I’m not going to try and find out because maybe being an “unknown giver” is a blessing for that person, too. Mason was just so beside himself that a person we know would love us enough to make such a sacrifice and remain anonymous. “You mean they don’t want us to thank them, Mom?”

If you, Giver of the Wii, are reading this…thank you, thank you, thank you!!! You have given us much delight!

Mason had actually been saving for a Wii and Michael had promised to give the last bit of it. Mason took the money he had saved and bought games, while Michael took the money he had promised to chip in and bought a controller. Aunt Lynne came to visit this week and she brought us Mario cart and some of those cool “steering wheels”. So now, we are pretty much hooked up.

Tennis is my favorite and the first day I played I sustained injuries both to my finger and shoulder. Mason has a black eye from where he hit himself with a steering wheel during a very "intense" Mario Cart race. No pain, no gain…that’s what I always say.

Isn’t that neat? How God could take the “desires of the heart” of a little boy and make them reality through someone else? I love that about God.

Bless ya!

Even More Tales From the Potty

Success!

Ethan! Has! Finally! Done it!

Last night at our Bible study group I bravely asked for prayer. Most of the other requests were for friends and family members who are sick or going through trials. When I sensed the lull that would carry us over into the actual task of prayer, I made the “ahem” noise and all eyes shifted to me.

“I know this may not seem important,” I began, “but would you all mind praying for Ethan and I in the task of potty training? It’s very frustrating to us both.”

I then launched into the condensed version of a tale so brutally true, I almost hated my transparence. It goes a little something like this…

A few days ago Ethan and I started into our ritual of every 30 minute bathroom visits. I’ll be honest: my mood wasn’t great. It seemed like I would put Ethan in the appropriate situation to be successful, only to have him be UNsuccessful minutes after removing him. Everything I have read about potty training says that this stage is a very sensitive one – one wrong move from me and the kid may never go correctly. So, I have had the inner war of really wanting to blow my top, yet asking the Lord to help me refrain for the sake of my child and my time management. I think I fell somewhere in the middle, probably a little closer to where I shouldn’t have been.

I explained to Ethan very “firmly” that only babies go poo-poo in their pants…you are a big boy…if you ever want to play with another toy again you’d better get this right…I’ll give you m&ms if you go…etc.

I know – I sound like a complete witch.

After several mishaps that day, I sighed in resignation and reached for a Pull Up. After jerking it up over his fanny he looked up at me with those big blue eyes, put his hands on my cheeks, gave me a kiss and said, “Thank you for not yelling at me, mommy…”

I grabbed him and cried and kissed him all over and told him how sorry I was for being so impatient. (Oh, my goodness! I’m tearing up now!) I told him that I loved him and that I make many of my own messes (not the same kind, of course) almost every day. I asked him to forgive me for loving my to-do list and my schedule and my clean bathroom too, too much.

He said he forgave me, then in typical Ethan fashion asked me, “Mommy, can we be tigers now?”

Ethan has had 2 successful attempts since last night. A big thanks to my Bible study group for praying, and for knowing that no thing is too small or too insignificant to ask of the Father.

Bless ya!

Silent and Deadly

This is NOT about what it sounds like it’s about.

No, it’s about Ethan. Again.

Ethan is a very jovial little fellow. He talks non-stop, asks “why” after everything I say, and has more volts (or wattage, or ohms…whatever works) than the energizer bunny. The kid lives and plays hard, then when he’s tired, he falls to the ground where he is and is nearly impossible to wake.

With Mason homeschooling, I often find myself distracted. I’m not complaining about it, but I can’t finish folding a basket of laundry without having to take Ethan to the potty, or find Ethan’s Thomas, or fix Ethan a snack, or juice, or put his shoes on. A couple times this week while Mason and I have been working together I’ve said, “Wait…do you hear that?”

“What, Mom?” he asks

“That silence. I must find your brother.”

Once, after one such interchange, I walked to the top of the steps to find that Ethan had decorated the hardwood floor with every sticker he could find in the house. There were monster trucks, Disney Princesses, Thomas the Tank Engine, and various cars and other vehicles. I believe these stickers were stocking stuffers…purchased from the Dollar Tree, no doubt…so one can only surmise at their quality. It didn’t take me long to realize that their removal was going to be a time consuming job, one I decided to leave for later. Bad idea. I’ll leave it at that.

One other time, after hearing a deafening and uncharacteristic silence from my youngest, I traipsed downstairs to find the playroom totally trashed. Books thrown from the shelves to the floor, paper spilled everywhere, Barbies strewn about, the desk overturned. I even found a ballet outfit on the one-legged Ken. Hmmm…

In both of these instances (and I have more), Ethan learned some (painful!) lessons about operating within the boundaries of the rules of our house (especially rule #4 – We don’t make unnecessary work for others), and I was reminded of something, too.

Here it is: If I don’t keep my house in order, it will progress to chaos very quickly. I don’t mean my literal “house” either, but rather “life”, I guess, though certainly my home would fall into this category. I’m thinking of things like relationships, physical, mental and spiritual health, and even my relationship with the Lord. If I don’t maintain my relationships, encourage them and keep short accounts, they can grow stale, or distant. If I don’t exercise and watch what I eat I can become sluggish and tired. And if I’m not daily feeding on the word of God, sitting at His feet and talking to him, it’s ME who suffers because I’m more prone to trust my own thoughts and feelings in the moment rather than what I know is true.

Chaos can slip up on me when I’m not watching out for it. Maybe I should be more alert!

Bless ya!

Tales From the Potty

This one IS what you think it’s about, so if you’re grossed in the slightest by bathroom stories or references, I implore you to hit the page down button. This will serve as your disclaimer!!!!! No complaints!

It seems like with each child potty training has gotten more difficult. With Mason, I bought “How to Potty Train in a Day,” or whatever that book was called. I followed it’s instructions more or less, and Mason was trained in mere days.

Caroline was a little more difficult, but still basically easy.

Molly, though she was (and is) a bright little spot of sunshine, she just about pushed me over the edge and Michael had to finally barge in and rescue us both.

Now we have Ethan. Ethan, Ethan, Ethan.

Ethan will go #1 when I take him and make him. This involves setting the kitchen timer for every 30 minutes, which I do. Sigh.

As for the other thing - #2 – not one ounce of success. I have tried and tried and tried, but he just won’t cooperate. In fact, I have had him sit on the potty for 30 minutes or so, only to have him “make his deposit” the minute I put the big boy pants back on.

The other afternoon I just decided that he and I were going to hang out in the bathroom and have fun. We made up songs about the potty, we made up cheers about things one DOES in the potty. It was a party. The time just flew by. I wish I could say that it was effective, but I cannot. I think Ethan’s favorite was: “Push it out! Push it out! Waaaay out! Hey!” Which he, in turn, DID as soon as the Blue’s Clues big-boy pants were back in place.

Ethan even sang it for Michael when he got home from work. Michael wasn’t impressed.

Finally, I decided that the approach to take with Ethan was just to lay it all out there and have an honest heart to heart talk. It went a little something like this:

ME: Ethan, sweetie, there’s nothing to be afraid of. Everyone poops in the potty! Mason does, Caroline does, Molly does, Daddy does…

ETHAN: Pawpaw does?

ME: He sure does!

ETHAN: Aunt Lynne does?

ME: Yes, yes! You’ve got it!

ETHAN: Yeah! Woo-Hoo! Hey Mommy…I lost my udder quock (translation: other croc)

Any tips? If anyone is still here reading this, I’m desperate!

Bless ya!

Life Soundtrack

I totally ripped this off from my friend Julie over at learningtowaltz.blogspot.com . This is just a fun/silly thing that tells you what the soundtrack would be if your life was a movie.

Here’s how it works:

1. Open your library (iTunes, Winamp, Media Player, iPod, etc)
2. Put it on shuffle
3. Press play
4. For every question, type the song that’s playing
5. When you go to a new question, press the next button
6. Don’t lie and try to pretend you're cool… and alot of the songs will fit with the setting

Here are mine...

Opening Credits:
I surrender all – amy grant

Waking Up:
in my hiding place – mike lunsford

First Day At School:
great and mighty – caedmon’s call

Falling In Love:
the shadow proves the sunshine - switchfoot

Fight Song:
we all bow down – twila paris

Breaking Up:
god is in control – twila paris

Prom night:
do you love me – andy cloninger

Life:
Jesus whispers – red mountain church, the gadsby project

Mental Breakdown:
the nightshift watchman – david wilcox

Driving:
where the streets have no name – u2 (ha!!)

Flashback:
we have seen your glory – twila paris

Getting back together:
trip through your wires – u2

Wedding:
you’re the only woman - ambrosia (yes... I DO like Ambrosia. No snide comments, please)

Birth of Child:
the world is alive – casting crowns

Final Battle:
spin - david wilcox

Funeral Song:
enter in – twila paris (!)

Final Credits:
now to him – paxson & allison jeancake

Yep, that's 2 minutes of your life you're not getting back!

Bless ya anyhow!

Ethan...

Ethan has said a couple of really funny things lately, and I wanted to share them.

When your kids are born you just automatically think "Here he/she is...the cutest, smartest, most wonderful child to ever live!" And of course it's true, because it's YOUR child. And we other parents don't mind hearing it from you, because we have also thought/said the same thing.

I think that with Ethan being the baby and everyone so much older than him, we forget the mental capabilities of one so young. For example, if I put a Matchbox car in the shopping cart, he knows it's for him, he wants it then, and he will ask for it when we get home. But for some reason it seems like I ought to be able to load up a cart full of his favorite toys - with him never noticing.

My 40th birthday is just around the corner. Michael has been taking the kids out "running errands" with him a lot lately. Recently after one such excursion, the girls were sitting in the floor of the kitchen and I walked in...

CAROLINE: Mommy, we went shopping for your birthday and we bought you something that you are really going to like! But we're NOT going to tell you what it is!

ETHAN: It's a phone.

CAROLINE: ETHAAAAAN!

OK, fast forward to last night at dinner. We're all sitting around and Caroline brings up the fact that while I do know it's a phone, I don't have any idea what kind of phone it actually is...

ETHAN: It's a Blackberry.

CAROLINE: ETHAAAAAAN!

One more example, then I'm done.

Michael and I have been trying really hard to potty train Ethan. Yes, he's 3, no he's not potty trained. One of the methods that we, as parents, believe in is pure, flat-out bribery. We are telling Ethan that if he learns to go potty like a big boy, we will give him a fire truck!!! Fire truck, fire truck, fire truck...it's all we ever speak of as we wait with bated (baited? I just don't know/care) breath for him to perform the...tasks...we've been trying to teach him.

As Michael was dressing the other day he told me that he bought a T-R-A-C-T-O-R for Ethan instead of the item we had discussed giving him (fire truck!). He spelled it out slowly and carefully for me then Ethan looked up at his dad with those big blue eyes and said, "Daddy, can I have my tractor NOW?"

He makes me laugh.

Bless ya!

Christmas Caroline

‘Tis the Season to be Jolly…and my children certainly are! Every day I have been making a list and checking it twice– on my Blackberry, or course- of all the events/meetings/parties/plays/performances that this family has going. We’re probably a lot like you: too busy at this time of year. I’d like to just sit with a mug of hot cocoa, listen to some carols play and gaze at the tree.

Funny thing about the carols. My girls-especially Caroline- really like to sing, you see. Remember that song “I Wear my Sunglasses at Night”? Did anyone ever really know the words to that song? Have you ever been listening to a song on the radio with a friend, and they sing the ACTUAL words of the song? Words that, though close to the ones you were singing, were just not quite right? Well, I have. Sunglasses at Night being one of those songs. FYI, it’s “the guy in shades, oh, no,” NOT “the guy who shaves his nose”. I think there is an entire website dedicated to wrong lyrics, but I digress.

Like I said…my girls love to sing, and if you have been to my house for any length of time this Christmas, you have probably heard proof of this. I don’t know if it’s their ages or if they have the “defunct” sickness I have of singing the wrong words, but let me give you a taste of the yuletide lyrical sensations:

…Don we now our gay apparel, fa, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la
Troll the Asian yuletide carol, fa, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la!

Silent night, Holy night, all is calm, all is bright,
Round your virgint, mother and child!

The cattle are lonely, the poor baby wakes, but little Lord Jesus, no crying he makes,
I love the Lord Jesus look down from the sky, and stay by my cradle, ‘til morning is night!

Glooooooo-ria, in Aunt Chelsea’s day-O!

Bless ya!

The Perfect Mom

Last night while I was making dinner, Molly and Caroline watched an episode of “Everyday Italian” on the Food Network. They love Giada.

Now, I’m no Giada. That’s a given. But I can make a mean homemade spaghetti sauce: fresh herbs from the garden, home-grown tomatoes and onions, a bit of red wine. Yum! Caroline especially like spaghetti…and thinks my homemade sauce is just “ok”. She prefers Michael’s mom’s recipe: a jar of Prego.

Anyway, as Molly and Caroline watched Giada perform her magic on a pork roast, this is what I heard from the kitchen…

“I wish Giada was our mom!”

“I know! Then she could teach us how to cook.”

“Yeah, and she’s so pretty.”

I wanted to go in there and explain to these girls that, yes, Giada appears perfect in every way, but she also has a make-up person, a hair person, a stylist to pick out her clothes, and a prep staff to do all her chopping. But I said nothing. I gotta admit it: it stung just a bit.

This is not the first time I have been compared to another and fallen short.

But through all the seeming discontent, I remember the truth: They love me. They trust me. We have our own quirky routines and secret handshakes. And in the middle of a stomach-bugged night, who do you think they want holding their hair back and making sure the Cinderella trash can remains steady? Certainly not the everyday Italian. They want their everyday, sweatshirt-wearing, makeup-on-by-noon-if-you’re-lucky mom. That’s me. I know where I stand.

Later I got out some pots and pans and some odds and ends from the frig. Molly and Caroline like to pretend like they have their own cooking show. They even talk to the camera like Giada– it’s adorable.

So, maybe Giada does have a better wardrobe than me…and maybe her spaghetti sauce has that certain something that mine doesn’t, but I have something she doesn’t have, and that is Caroline and Molly. They are all mine (and Michael’s!)

Oh! Giada! If you’re reading this…no offense, ok?!!

Bless ya!

The Simple Life

Simplicity: Freedom from difficulty, complexity, or intricacy

Let’s face it…life is complicated. Since last spring I have been taking slow steps to rid my life of some complexity. One obvious place to begin was within my 4 walls. I’ve just been going room by room trying to take a good hard look at my “stuff”. Is it necessary? Do I use it? Does it just take up space? Do I have to clean around it?

I managed to rid my linen closet of 2 bags of stuff, from towels to sheets, right down to one of the vacuum cleaners. The kids’ possessions have been pared down as well (actually, just the girls so far…I’ve yet to muster the courage to enter the boys’ room).

In my bathroom, I’ve made some changes as well. No more moisturizers or products of any kind until the ones I have are gone. How did I end up with 6 bottles of lotion??

The most recent area to receive the treatment was my own closet. Yesterday evening I made the switch from summer clothes to fall/winter. I know that may sound odd to my central Illinois friends, but here in LA (lower Alabama) summer lasts at least until Halloween. It was almost 80 yesterday.

I went through every article of clothing. If it needed mending, out it went. Dry clean only? Buh-bye! (This may seem a bit extreme, but I just don’t live a lifestyle where I need much of anything fancy or high-maintenance. So, except for a couple things, I cleared that detail from my life.) The mountain of clothes in the “out” pile was bigger than the “keep” pile. I think I am the thrift store’s best friend. Was it scary? A bit. What if I need THAT black skirt? Forget the fact that there is another, lower-maintenance black skirt right there; what if I need THAT one?

The economic crises is affecting everyone, but I don’t really have many “assets” to fret over. And as the excess baggage is being purged from my life (and it's more than just clothes and bottles of lotion...other areas of life are having to be minimalized as well), it really is freeing me up to think about other things.

Now, I’m not going to go overboard or anything. The French Press will remain on my kitchen counter, and I’m not getting rid of ANY books – mine or the kids.

I guess my goal, ultimately, is to change forever the way my to-do list looks. Instead of it being filled with frantic attempts to maintain things that aren’t important in the whole scheme of life (organize linen closet, sort through bathroom cabinets), I’d like it to be more filled with things that are sweet to my soul (work on Mason’s scrapbook, take a picnic to the park, have coffee with _______ , write a note to_______ ). I’ve got to figure that if I have less “stuff” to organize or sort…there will be more of me to give to people I love.

What do YOU think?

Bless ya!

Painted Lattice

I was in charge of organizing the Women’s Retreat at our church. The retreat itself was this past weekend…our speaker was great, the retreat went according to schedule, etc. All was well.

Let me go ahead and say it right now: my husband is wonderful. He is a great dad and when he is home with the kids while I am out of pocket (as I was this past Friday and Saturday), I know the kids are going to have fun, and lots of it. Sure, the kitchen may be a little dirty when I get home, and the girls’ outfits may not exactly “match” (think purple pants and red shirt), but I am 100% sure they have been loved and cared for in my absence.

During this particular absence, however, things went a little more…awry…than usual.

For one thing, Michael decided to paint. The house. The rest of the house, I should say. The painting of the house is kind of a joke around here. See, it was a project that began mid-July. Yes, your calculations are correct: it has been 4 months in-process. We started with a bang, and we really did get the majority of the house covered in paint, but we fizzled out when we faced the lattice work around our deck. Michael was going to borrow a sprayer from a friend, messages were left. Then, we moved into Lovebug season. Imagine millions of little mating bugs floating around, landing on everything – especially everything white (the color we were using!). Painting was put off again.

The Saturday morning of retreat weekend seemed, to Michael, as good a time as any, so with no thought to my being absent from home (he is such a renaissance man!), the painting began. Imagine my happiness when I pulled into my driveway and saw a gleaming white, Lovebug-free lattice!

I was pleased as the proverbial punch. My husband – painter of lattice! I saw Ethan running to me as I got out of the car. Wait…is he covered in paint? Are those the new Oshkosh sweatpants? Ummmm…yep. And Caroline…are those the black GYMBOREE LEGGINGS that I bought to go with virtually everything this winter? Uh-huh (Alex…gasp with me!! Feel my pain!). Molly…did any white paint get anywhere other than your clothes?

OK – don’t panic. Don’t worry! It’s just clothing! They have more! It’s really no big deal.

Wait…are those white footprints? On the carport floor? In the VAN? ON THE COMFORTER IN THE GUESTROOM??? Yes, not only were the kids clothes (and hair!) coated in paint, so were the van floor and my guestroom comforter.

I tease Michael (because these kinds of things have happened before…also with paint) that he should just go into the kids’ closets, pull out their nicest stuff and pick a dirty project. I didn’t think he took me seriously.

I balled up the clothes and threw them out. The paint on the floor of the van will eventually blend in with all the other funk in there. The guestroom comforter? Well, that’s a little different…but I think that thing may be reversible. The important thing is that everyone is still alive, and the lattice is white. Michael is still wonderful, the kids had a wonderful time with their dad, and I got another lesson on what is (and is NOT) important.

One funny thing: the white paint on the comforter actually came from the bottoms of Molly’s shoes. See, Michael gave her some “discipline” for walking through spilled paint, and then purposely walking around in the van making footprints. Seems like if he was giving her discipline for making paint footprints, he’d have checked the bottoms of her shoes before taking her inside to administer said discipline. I’m just sayin’.

Bless ya!

A Clean Shave

Molly, who's six, has just recently begun to take some "bigger girl" steps. One of those being graduating from the bath to the shower. I remember when that transition occured in my own life, somewhere around her age. Molly is always wanting to do things like me: wear make up, fix her hair, feed babies, walk around in fancy shoes (ok, so that one is really NOT like me...but you get the picture).

A couple nights ago Molly came in to see me when she was done in the shower. She was holding a hanky up to the spot just underneath her nose.

"What's wrong?" I inquired.

"I'm bleeding," Molly replied.

"How did you cut yourself?" I asked.

"Well Mommy, I don't want to lie so I'm just going to tell you the truth. I decided I wanted to shave just like you do, so I used your razor in the shower and cut my lip."

Priceless.

Bless ya!

Longing for the Lion King

There are 6 years separating my oldest and youngest children. When Mason (my oldest) was younger, I did let him watch TV, but I guarded it very heavily and was very choosy (and still am). Veggie Tales were good, Sesame Street was good, and Barnie (I’m ashamed to say) was indeed, good. Mason’s favorite thing to watch was “The Grapes of Wrath” – a Veggie Tales story about forgiveness. He watched it at least once a day. Even now, I can still quote the thing from memory…but I’ll save that for another blog entry.

When Mason was 14 months old, along came Caroline. As he grew I began to let him widen his horizons, so to speak, and along came Disney. Lion King was all he wanted to watch (I can quote it as well. Again…another blog entry)! With Caroline tagging along, of course. Caroline enjoyed the Grapes of Wrath, too, but she wanted to watch what her brother was watching.

Then along came Molly, and more of the same…they are watching bigger kid stuff at younger ages because there is another, older kid watching too.

Ethan, my youngest, is now 2. There is a bigger gap between he and the older children, so I have been able to introduce him to Sesame Street while siblings are at school, and he really likes it.

Which, let me go ahead and say how much I love it myself. I’m even going to go so far as to admit – here on cyberspace – that I enjoyed the show well into my sixth grade year and stopped watching it only because I knew that if any of my friends ever found out, they would laugh at me. But come on! 1, 2, 3…4, 5, 6…7, 8, 9…10, 11, 12…and they all played games…at the ladybug picnic! Classic.

A couple days ago Ethan came to me and said, “Ma…me watch ‘Be Te Ay For’”

“What?”

“Be Te Ay For!”

Then it hit me: Ben Ten Alien Force. Good grief!

Bless ya!

Wanting to be Minty Fresh

Let me tell you about my Saturday morning...

It started out almost as perfect as perfect can get, in that I was able to sleep until 9:00am. No, that's NOT a typo. My 4 high maintenance kids let me sleep in. The other miraculous thing about that is the fact that Michael wasn't even home. he left before 6am to go on a many-mile bike ride, and I didn't expect him home until about 11am or so. The kids let me sleep in and took care of themselves until 9am. Wow.

I walked blurry-eyed into the kitchen after profusely thanking my children for the extra hour or two of REM sleep. As I was adding beans to the grinder, the phone rang. A very excited Michael was on the other end. He had finished his ride and wanted me to go pick up all the "stuff" he was bringing home and couldn't carry himself on his bike. I told him I was fresh out of the bed, but assured him I would just "throw on some clothes" and be there in a jiffy.

I stuck the kids in the car, Ethan still in the diaper from the night before and me with sleep creases on my face, hair disheveled, and a good case of dragon breath. It was not pretty.

When I arrived at the square and saw Michael, I quickly realized that there was some form of miscommunication. My idea of "picking up" and his idea were not one and the same. Michael wanted us to actually EXIT the car, mill around with other riders, mingle and be a part of the post-ride scene. I was having none of it! I tried to explain to Michael about the dragon breath, but his retort was "Well, I don't have great breath either!"

Michael got the kids out of the car. Ethan, in jammies, heavy, down-to-the-knees diaper, and no shoes, Molly dressed like Nanook in long sleeves, jeans and a fleece (it was already at least 80 degrees), Mason and Caroline all took off running. I sat in the car. I had the engine running so I could benefit from the air conditioner, but looked down to see that I was already past the little red line. I had 30 minutes to wait until Michael's lunch arrived from a local BBQ place, and I new I would run out of gas.

So, I called Michael over, explained the situation, told him I was going home to brush my teeth and change Ethan's diaper and that I would be back in a flash.

On the way home I fumed. Why can't Michael understand how I feel? Why would Michael tell me to come get his stuff when all the stuff isn't there yet (the lunch wasn't there)? Doesn't Michael understand that I was fresh out of the bed and might need a few minutes - not to PRIMP - but to look presentable!? Me! Me! Me!

After taking 5 minutes to do the necessaries, I was back on the road.

When I got back up to the square, I saw that Molly was pasty looking. She was also crying. I took off her fleece and told her to go sit on the courthouse steps. We stood around, Molly's wails filling up the background. Lunch had arrived (finally!), and Michael was picking his up when I heard it...

"MAMA!!!!"

I turned and ran over to Molly just in time to help her lean over the side rail and lose her breakfast. I don't think I'll ever feel the same way about pumpkin bread again.

After wiping Molly off with the only thing I had - her fleece, we headed home...

Here's where I'll insert the pithy little tidbit about what God taught me.

Michael wanted me to come up to the courthouse to revel with him in his finishing his first big bike ride. Fresh breath and a baby that doesn't smell like tee-tee were higher priorities for me. If I could do it all over and understand his motive, I hope that I would be a more loving and less selfish wife. Unfortunately, I don't get another chance to relive those moments (and let's face it...in some ways I'm mighty thankful), but because God is a God of grace, and because my husband loves me, I'll have many more chances to try. Some of those chances will result in my successfully loving others well. Some of them, unfortunately, will result in my failure...but through it all, God is committed to completing the work he began. That IS comforting!

I'm thankful I never get tossed.

Bless ya!

One Simple Thing

“Hey, Lady! Move it!”

The words pelted me like pebbles. No, I wasn’t in anyone’s way…the words were coming from…you guessed it, my two-year-old.

We were together – Ethan and I - in the bathroom while I put on my face. I was distracted by my own thoughts, so I didn’t quite see what was happening until the words took form and kicked me out of my stupor. Ethan had 2 matchbox cars, one behind the other.

“Move it, Lady! Move out my way!”

Then it hit me…he’s imitating ME!

Fourth kid…you’d think I would have a couple of things figured out by now.

Another instance: This morning I went shopping. Before dropping Mason off at Michael’s study (so he could do his school work), Mason gave me his wallet with very explicit instructions. I was to buy a “Lego Indiana Jones” game for Nintendo DS, but ONLY if it cost less than $30. If it cost MORE than $30, I was to buy “Lego Batman” instead. (This is all Mason’s money, by the way)

When I returned home, Michael and Mason were doing history work. Mason interrupted to ask, “Mom, did you get my game?”

I teased him. I said, “No, Mason, I forgot to get your game! I am so sorry! I can’t believe I forgot!”

“Mom!” Mason said in reply, “I told you 5 times and I gave you my wallet…and YOU COULDN’T DO ONE SIMPLE THING FOR ME?”

Oh my goodness…my words exactly. I’m sure of it!

The flip side is just as startling. Yesterday Michael’s mom had to have a heart catheterization because of some chest pain she was having. I explained this to the kids and then last night as I was putting the kids to bed, Molly was very teary and sad.

“I want Nana!” she cried. “I’m afraid something bad is going to happen to Nana!”

I tried to comfort her, to do what I could do to ease her anxiety, but it was Caroline who stepped up to the plate: “Molly, God loves Nana and he is taking care of her. Would you feel better if we prayed for her?”

These little people watch everything I do! They listen to what I say and then, at times, say it themselves. What a responsibility! What a daunting task! How humbling…and ultimately, sanctifying.

I love moments like this. Can I be honest? I feel like almost nightly I go to bed thinking “I did a bad job today,” but the Father is so sweet to show me that he is using me in their lives despite my many failures and mess ups…in fact…and this blows my mind…he is sanctifying THEM through me as much as he is sanctifying me through them.

Bless ya!