Finding God in the Noodles

Michael and I have come to the conclusion that our children need a crash course on table manners. Now, they aren’t jumping on the table, or throwing stuff at each other, but somehow napkins don’t seem to make it to laps, there is a lot of wiggling, singing, elbows on the table…that sort of thing. Now, just like with anything, balance is the key. In our house, when we have spaghetti, noodles will be placed under the nose. We make noodle moustaches each and every time there is a noodle cooked on my stove. In fact, if we have noodles at your house, we will probably make noodle moustaches there as well. (Incidentally – there is one other thing we sometimes do with noodles. It involves the noodle and the word “achoo!”. I’ll let you do the math…)

Last night at dinner, I informed the fam that from now on, we are going to take a “hard line” with the table manners. I bought a book. We are going to have examples of what not to do (starring Michael) as well as examples of the correct things to do (starring…me). It’s going to be a rich learning environment, I promise you.

Anyhow, once we had finished dinner and were kind of sitting around talking to each other, Ethan got up from his chair and went and sat with Michael. Michael is really into the crystal light singles – where you just pour the mix right into your glass or bottle of water (it just makes Monroeville water taste better – and every little bit helps). He (Michael) was sitting there with at least 2/3 of a glass full of something red. Ethan went over there, sat in his lap and began trying to drink from Michael’s cup.

Now, before you start thinking, “Wow…Amy can see into the future!”, let me also add that I had mopped the kitchen floor that day. So, it goes without saying, really. The rule is, on the day you mop, the children will want chocolate pudding for an after school snack, or they will end up eating (and dropping) rice krispies (once those suckers get down there and harden, walking near the table is almost like walking on crunchy bubble-wrap). As I watched sweet Ethan heaving Michael’s glass up to his mouth my thought was, “What a sweet boy…who is about to spill red stuff all over my floor.”

Splash!

Ethan started to cry. The reasons – probably two-fold. Firstly, he was wondering if he was going to get disciplined (which he didn’t, of course, but I know him and know that would be his first thought), and secondly, the water was cold. Ethan was covered in cold, pink stuff, so I took him to the bathroom and started running the tub. Meanwhile, over the hum of the bath water, I heard a scream. A blood-curdling scream.

I thought at first maybe I had imagined it, but no, it continued. I called Molly into the bathroom to watch Ethan so I could go see what the problem was. Evidently, Mason was spinning Caroline around in the kitchen, she slipped, and her face nailed the floor. Her forehead looked like it was wearing a purple marble.

Maybe table manners are overrated? If we had just stayed in our seats putting noodles up our noses, no one would have gotten hurt, right? You know what else I learned? Even the best table manners in the world cannot control chaos. It might make a meal more pleasant, but they won’t give life. Don’t get me wrong! I’m not saying “since the world is chaotic and sad, let’s just forget about table manners”. That’s not what I’m saying at all. The point I am trying to make is: Manners – important. They sort of “bring God’s kingdom to bear” right there at the dinner table. They (good manners) are a way to love others, and we are all about making our children understand this. However, they won’t solve the world’s problems, so if we occasionally slip up, God is still God. I am talking bigger picture here, folks, and I am really just talking to myself.

So. Noodles all around! A-A-A-choo!

Bless ya!